Users By Steve Cook First (and probably the last) in an occasional series of articles examining the people who keep the industry going. 1. The Experienced Novice For the sake of the article, we'll call him Norman. Now Norman is probably in his mid-twenties and has been involved with computers from back in the days of the 1K Spectrum. Lacking in manual dexterity, Norman graduated towards the world of adventures. Now he's not exactly a thickie, it's just that he cannot get his head around the concept of lateral thinking, something of a major disability. This means that after about 10 years, Norman has only ever completed one adventure unaided (almost). After upgrading to an Acorn Electron, Norm found himself struggling with "The Sphinx". After six months, the included hints, several letters to the man who wrote the adventures column in the Electron Magazine, our Norm gave up. He just could not get over that bridge (if only he'd rubbed that acorn!) Unabashed, Norman upgraded to the Amstrad CPC 6128 because he'd heard all about the brilliant adventures coming from an American company called Infocom. A week after paying out his money, Norman read with great anxiety that Infocom were not going to continue converting their wares onto the CPC. (Another thing - our Norman isn't the luckiest bloke around). But whilst the going was good, Norm went out and bought Wishbringer (introductory level). Here was the pinnacle of Norman's adventuring career. In four weeks the game was completed, and he'd only peeked a couple of times at the adventure helpline columns. Some of the shine was taken off though when his nine year old niece sat down and worked her way through the game in about 2 1/2 hours. But, not to be put off, our hero continued to fail miserably on a great selection of adventures. After a couple of years it was again time to upgrade and the obvious choice at the time was the Atari ST. Once again, Infocom games were back on the menu. Zork: Great game if only he could have got into that house. Still, the 2% he'd completed had been most enjoyable. Hitchhikers: Another gem. With all the usual help relied upon, Norm finds himself struggling with - you can guess this - the babel fish. He never stood a chance. Beyond Zork: This is more like it. Very nearly a success this, over 60% completed. If only he could have got that helmet to work. The secret of Norm's success here was a very nice lady called Sue who provided enough help for a brain-dead moron to finish the game. Still, 60% is not to be sniffed at. With the glow of pride still flushing his cheeks, Norman had found a new style of game he could attempt, the RPGs. Norm rushed out and bought Bard's Tale. A great game and Norman spent months happily running around getting absolutely nowhere but beating the hell out of passing bands of nomads and loving every minute of it. The next step on was a little French number called Drakkhen. Great game - really fun, but how the hell did you get into that castle without being turned into strawberry jam? And then, the ultimate! First person perspective, massive dungeons, loads of stuff to collect, monsters to scrap with, spells to cast. What else could it have been? Dungeon Master! Four months, many bald patches, several hint books, umpteen "complete solutions" printed in various computer mags later, Level Three is still a far off, much dreamed of place. Time for a new computer and, hopefully, a change of luck. Norman is now the proud owner of an Amiga A500. His software collection comprises all the "must-buys". Captive: Yes, he is ... on Level One. Galdregon's Domain: He can keep it, Norm got nowhere fast. DM and Chaos: Looks great, but demoralising. So much there, so little accessible. Bard's Tale 1-3: See above. Eye of the Beholder: How do you get past those bloody spiders. Please note that the spiders reside on Level 4!! - thanks, Sue. So there you have it. Norman owns the latest in home computers, the Amiga, but he's holding onto his old CPC just in case, one day, he does manage to get somewhere in "Heroes of Karn". His persistence does him credit but gets him nowhere. And to rub salt into the wound, every time he looks in desperation at the helpline columns, he has to read about some 13 year old who's complaining about how he finished DM in only three days and how simple it all was - bloody infuriating. So there we leave Norman and I think it's reached the stage in the article (i.e. everyone's long since lost interest and stopped reading) where I can confess that this is all autobiographical. I know you're shocked, aren't you, but, never mind, we all have our crosses to bear. I'd like to thank Sue Medley, the Pilgrim, The Boggit and many others who man adventure helplines and adventure columns, people who we experienced novices - 'crap adventurers' - would be totally lost without. And one final thought. If you've noticed any symptoms in yourself, then feel free to join the society I'm forming - well, just as soon as I've sussed out how to form a society. I've got the name, though, FIDDLERS - Floundering In Deepest Dungeons Losing Energy, Reload Soon!?! Anyway, to all prospective members ... good luck. If you're anything like me, you're gonna need it!