Trinity - Borphee Computers - œ6.50 Reviewed (at last) by James Judge on a 486sx Two things before the review starts. First off a quick apology to the Grue (who wrote this game) - sorry for the length of time it has taken me to do this review, I just didn't have time what with exams and other real life stuff going on. Secondly this game is only available for the PC and it costs œ6.50. To get it send a cheque or postal order (made payable to Borphee Computers) to: Borphee Computers, 64 County Road, Ormskirk, West Lancs, L39 1QH. You know it makes sense! On with the review... (to get the full effect please read the following in the sing-song manner used by many preachers when saying a litany) -- We are gathered here today, brothers (and sisters, of course), to commemorate the memory of that hapless adventurer who liked to go on holiday. Yes brothers, that same saint-like adventurer who, a year ago, took a holiday to Arizona. Lo!! Many are the sorrowful tales that are told of this misery filled sojourn into Arizona, but none as bad as the loss of the sacred - nay - righteous hat. Let us say a few words in the Pope's mother tongue (Italian, you heathens!) to pay respect to this sorrowful misplacement of the said cap... "Mi da qualcose contro la diarrea" Yes brothers (oh, and the sisters...), these are the times to remember this unhappy journey and learn from the mistakes made by this naive adventurer who is still on the path to true enlightenment. But wait brothers, let me tell you how to commemorate these events. Now is not the time to whip out the birch branches and start lashing yourselves into a frenzy, although I am sure by doing so you will enhance the experience provided by this commemoration, now is the time to start booting up those PCs! Yes brothers (OK, and the sisters!), one of our fold has provided us the perfect tool with which to remember and learn from that fateful loss of the pious headgear. Take unto those PCs a copy of Trinity, written by Brother Grue, and let thyselves(?!?) be caught up in the holy dash to the Pope's sacred home (Rome, you pagans!) by this same self bumbling, yet devout, adventurer. Let us say a few more words to honour Brother Grue... "Ho bisogno di altre grucce" Lo brothers (yes, and the aforementioned sisters, for crying out loud!), through the completion of this virtuous adventure game you will start at home, trying to gather all the items that you need to go on holiday. A very testing time indeed. Then brother, you must face the arduous journeys through the lanes, across the roads and over the vast expanses of motor way that doth infest our society to arrive at the imposing airport. Here you will face the Herculean task of gaining passage to your aeroplane and, from there, take the cleansing trip to Rome. But hasten yee not, brothers, for have thee forgotten something on thy mad dash to the holy city? Check thy bonces, brothers (yep, and those damned... (Ooops, sorry - Hail Mary, Hail Mary, Hail Mary, Hail Mary) blessed sisters). What do thy feelst not? LO!!!! The just hat is missing. Let us say some more words in penance "Il motore si surricalda" And so your commemoration of the fateful trip to Arizona will take place with thy trying to replace the lost headgear and making an enlightening trip to Rome where thee will get to practice Italian and visit many interesting places, such as the holy Grottaferrata and the devout Fidget's Fettucinni Feastarama. And brothers, you will gain twelve disciples to perform a miracle. Praise be! A few more words before I ordain this game and thee can then go on thou way to playest it... "Non puo entrare, lo spettacolo e iniziato" I doth ordain this game, in the name of the Father, Son and Holy ghost to be a bloody good text adventure. -- Just in case all of that whipped by you in a flash and you haven't the faintest what is going on, here is the review in plain English. You play a guy who is going on holiday but has lost his hat. To you and I this event is fine - just forget it, but memories of last year's excursion to Arizona plague the poor guy, so you have to try and get a hat for him. The game starts off with you in the house trying to collect the items you need to go on holiday (you know, tickets, sun block, conkers, stick-on Garfields, the usual) and then actually trying to get hold of a hat. The adventure takes you on to the airport where you lose your luggage and have great difficulty boarding your plane (to say the least). Then it's off on holiday and the tasks and tribulations of being a holiday maker in Rome. In a word this game is brilliant. While I haven't gotten all that far into it, what I have seen has been impeccable, with a great attention to detail (I especially liked the inclusion of the Myth & Magic collection and Infocom games at the start), a cooky sense of humour and brilliant, mainly logical puzzles. The text is functional, not flowery (thankfully), without the usual dirge of spelling and grammatical errors normally present in a shareware text adventure. For your œ6.50 you'll get the game, a sense of well being and a nifty printed manual (from which I purloined those useful Italian phrases above). The manual is nicely done with some funny clip art, handy hints, background as well as a map of the maze in the game. Haha! This game continues in the best of the Grue style, first made present by the Four Symbols. If you like a good text adventure in the old Infocom style (sort of) or you've played another game by the Grue and want more then this game is perfect. It has a good learning curve so you won't be stuck right at the beginning (well... that depends I s'pose). I can't heap enough praise onto this game. It may not be to everyone's liking as there are no muscle-bound warriors, leather clad priests, zombies or monsters disappearing in puffs of green smoke after you've thrown your entire inventory at them. Instead it's just a fun excursion which embodies everything a text adventure should be. The Grue's creativity coupled with the power of TADS has produced a game which everyone should buy, play and swear at - you'll all thoroughly enjoy it. Let us say a few words in praise of this achievement... "Spaghetti, ravioli, pasta, tagliotelli, pizza, Dolmio!" In the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Ghost thanks Christ that review's over. Now where's the Bloody Mary... . - o -