Douglas Adams's Starship Titanic
                   A novel by Terry Jones
                     Morley Books œ5.99

                      Reviewed by Sue

I've long been a fan of Douglas Adams's books, but I can't say the
same for his computer games. Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy,
published by Infocom, annoyed the heck out of me by having an
erratic scoring system which suddenly upped my score by a large
amount towards the end of the game. One minute I thought I had a
lot more game to play; the next ... The End. Bureaucracy, which
also came from Infocom, took weirdness to new heights and I only
finished it with great difficulty. So when I heard that his latest
game was called Starship Titanic, a part of me shook her head and
decided not to play it unless it came out very, very cheaply.
Reading the book was another matter, however, so when this
paperback caught my eye in Sidcup Library, I scooped it up
quickly.

Of course, point number one is that it ISN'T written by DA, but by
Terry Jones, the Python who always insisted on stripping off.
Having played the organ 'sans' clothes, and been a butt-naked
hermit in Life of Brian, it was a natural progression to write a
book in the buff. And, there he is, on the inside back cover,
without a stitch on, a sticky label tastefully stuck over the
relevant 'bits' by Sidcup Library so as not to upset anyone. As
if.

So, how did Terry Jones come to write the book? He did the voice
for a demented parrot in the computer game and when, in a moment
of weakness, he asked Douglas Adams if he could "do anything else
to help?" it took only a second for Douglas to say "Wanna write
the book?" So once the conditions re writing naked had been
agreed, Terry J started typing.

As I said, I haven't played the game, but I've helped a few people
out with hints when they got stuck so I know a smidgeon about the
storyline which involves the biggest starship ever built. This
lands on a house on Earth and you, the player, end up on board
where you have to find the missing bits of the controlling
computer's brain, in order to get home. The computer is called
Titania and all her missing bits are part of her head so are
described as, for example, her ears or nose, and a large chunk of
the game is taken up with you trying to upgrade your class on the
starship to first class so as to be able to access other areas.

The book follows the game's plot v-e-r-y loosely. Oh yes, there is
a starship and, yes, it IS big - very big. And, indeed, it DOES
crash on a house. But three people end up on board, plus an alien
journalist, and it is the interplay between the different
characters which is more important than the underlying storyline
which is very thin.  Titania HAS been dismantled and putting her
together is important, but all but one of the missing pieces are
found within a page and a half of the book, and the last bit is
actually *on* Earth, so clearly the ending is different since
getting back to Earth is simply part of the story, not the finale.

The characters, Nettie, Dan, Lucy and The (short for The
Journalist, who is the alien) are well written and the story is
entertaining enough. It has also made me keen to play the game and
see how much the scenery differs on board the starship. Do the
gondoliers on the Grand Axial Canal *really* stop singing when you
enter their boats and restart when you leave? Is the LiftBot quite
as annoying as in the book, and the DeskBot as obnoxious?  One day
I'll find out.  In the mean time, I'd say, read the book for fun,
but if you're stuck in the game, don't expect it to help!












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