Monty Python and the Search for the Holy Grail Hints and Tips by author unknown; from the Net Monty Python and the Quest for the Holy Grail uses a sadistically perverted logic only known to the creators. However, the following hints and tips should help you masochists who want to finish the game. First, fill out the registration. I know. It's very long. Something like one hundred and twenty five questions. You cannot finish the game without doing it. Now, we will pretend we're riding horses. Clap those coconuts. A Sign from God What's this? A billboard advertising huge tracts of land? Uh, no, guess not. That's God in that billboard, ain't it? Find the Grail, he says. Oh, fine. And what about all these other items in my inventory? I'll bet I have to find all them, too! So, why don't you use your mouse and click on things, like that outline of a grail. OOPS! A coconut? Hey! What's that bird doing with my coconut? Kill that bird! Thanks! Now that the coconut is in my inventory a cute little arrow has popped up on the bottom right of my screen. I'll bet you have to click on it to go to the next scene. Before going to the next scene, explore this one a bit more. You should be able to find a Helmet, Bananas, gold coins and a grail. Once you have the grail click on the edge of the billboard to change the sign. Ride, Sally, ride. Plague Village Oh, fine. They've got the plague in this village. Just great. Click on the guard calling out, "Bring out your dead." After his conversation with the individual carrying the lively corpse, click on the guard again and then the man. Play Drop Dead, then click on Run Away. Click anywhere and a naked man falls into the scene. Click on him to get another bird and forward arrow. Other inventory items in the scene include the coins under the Dung, the Dung, and seven Knights (keep clicking on the naked man and the pouncing knights). There is a second pile of coins available if you bring out the woman with her cat enough times. Ride on. Witch Village Do you know how silly it is to pretend that the sound of coconuts clapping is a horse? This is not radio, it's film! The audience can see that we don't have any horses! Click on the Knight and then the Witch until you're able to play Burn the Witch and Run Away. Click on the Witch to get another bird to shoot down. Click on the chicken to make him fly three times and you'll hear a tune. Duplicate the tune by clicking on sections of the crowd and the Witch will dance the cootchy-cootchy. There are some coins in the window behind the crowd. Giddyap. Black Knight Criminy! That bloke dressed in black just cleaved that man in twain! That's just got to hurt! What do you mean go inside the tent? I don't want to be twained! To get inside the tent, explore a number of things and eventually you'll be offered the opportunity to play the arcade game (the cow's skull has an amusing tale to tell). Afterwards, shoot that stupid coconut bird again to move to the next scene. Don't do so just yet. Clicking on the right empty part of the screen pops out a friar with a boil on his nose. Click the boil to get some more gold coins. Click on the empty stream on the left, filling it up, and then go into the tent. Don't leave without the Knight's Sword, Tights and some more gold coins. Now ride. Book of the Game A book! Read a book!? Don't be daft. It's not honorable. Next thing you'll be asking me is to wear women's clothes (I'm a lumberjack, I am). You don't have to read it. Just turn the pages. Click on the pictures. Pay particular attention to the spread on Sir Lancelot. See the outline of a missing sword on the left page? Keep turning. Shoot the bird. Buy a shrub for the Knights of Ni, if you want. Now, page back to the beginning and flip the pages again. One of them now has the Certain Death sign. Ride. Camelot Honey, I'm home! Honey? Gwen? Where are you? Say, where is Gwen, anyway? Is she with Lancelot or ain't I married yet? Explore. Eventually you'll have to shoot the dancing blue cloud and another bird. Then take all the bricks you can. Get cold coins from the blue dancer. Mount up. Lombard It was silly enough when there was just two of us pretending to ride horses. Now we're all doing it! Click on the hands as they appear. Play Catch the Cow. Click anywhere and shoot the bird. Click on the Knight in blue once. Then click several times on King Arthur to get the Sheep's Bladder. Explore the castle bricks to get the Vous sign, gold coins, and a Samurai helmet. Check under the skirts of the knights for another fake grail. Ride on. Anthrax This is completely unfair. Anthrax is a castle filled with young, beautiful, horny women. Why send Galahad? He's completely chaste! What a waste. Explore outside the castle first for Flowers, Broccoli and gold. Check out the sky for all the signs of the Zodiac. Go inside the castle to play Spank the Virgin. Score high enough to enter the Nude Bonus round. You'll get a four number code for the code wheel above the door to the castle. Enter the code and get the grail. Light up the windows. Carve the tree. Light up the neon lights on the castle. Click on Zoot's hat (she's hiding at the bottom of the screen) and shoot the cherub. Enter the castle and undress the ladies to get the Bodice of a Virgin. Hi, yo, Silver! Cave of Caerbannos I can't believe it. Now I'm shouting out commands to dismount these invisible horses and we do! Arghhh! What a low budget game this is. Pay attention to the location of the extra four knights who roll in and out of this scene. You'll have to roll out those knights and then click on the cave entrance to bring out the rabbit. Click on the rabbit if you dare. Heh-heh. Click-drag a holy grenade to the cave entrance. Let go on three. Keep clicking on the cave entrance to get a wooden rabbit. By the left flank, march! Bridge of Death Criminy! That was horrible! You might have warned me! That rodent might have torn my throat out! Get Huge Tracts of Land from behind the bridge. Okay, now comes the tricky stuff. You're still missing some inventory items and you still have to place nine of the items you have in order to put in the ten planks it takes to cross the bridge and get the real Holy Grail. Yes, all the others are fakes. Why don't you try going back to the locations you've been to on your own to see what you can find on your own? If you get stuck read the next section. To more easily get to specific places hit the escape key and click on a map location. To skip animations and movies you've already seen press the spacebar. Go, Trigger, go! Missing items Okay, I tried. Where are the rest of the goodies? Oh, come on, you call that trying? Oh, well. Zoot's Medallion is hidden in God's beard. The dead body is in Plague Village. Click on the leaf near the Black Knight and click on it again to get the Key. Joseph of Aramathea appears in Witch Village. Camelot is in Camelot. Get along little doggies. Bridge building What do I do with all this stuff? Place Huge Tracts of Land on God's sign, Camelot on the cart, the Bodice on the naked Witch, the Samurai Helmet on the head in the Black Knight's tent, the Dead Body in Camelot's coffin (you'll have to explore Camelot a bit to find the coffin), the Wooden Rabbit just below Lombard castle's upper left bricks, Zoot's Medallion on Zoot's cap, Joseph on his pedestal, and Certain Death in the left hand bottom corner of the bridge scene. Clippity-clop. Final tips Click on the Bridge Keeper to shoot the bird. Click again and he'll check out your Registration form and ask three questions. Pass and you can walk across the bridge, see a movie and get the grail. I am not fat! Why am I told I'm too heavy to cross the bridge? Dump the rest of your inventory into the Plague Village barrel (you won't be able to dump the Key or fake grails, so don't worry about it). Spend your gold on shrubbery for the Knights of Ni. - o -